︎︎︎
EXCERPTS FROM LOVESPILLINGS, BLUE INK PUBLISHERS, 2021.
1
I layer the chocolate cake
carefully
to learn a thing or two about life
I listen to you
faithfully
to see a thing or two, or all about myself
I wake up
in the middle of the night
to feel your body over mine
weeping
I try to hold you
gently
yet I am still loud most of the time
I love you
slowly
and surely
this contextual feeling
2
(listen)
I am whispering
always
more than what I am just saying.
3
in the morning on the bed
I drizzle some honey down my arms
and let you sprinkle some chili flakes on top
will you come lick me?
I am in the middle
of something
you call my name
I turn my head
don’t feel like speaking
a kid in
the quiet evening
hold on
let me kill
this darling
am I crying
or sleeping?
your skin
is too soft
for me to
love you hard
the song of some poet yet to come
the work for
which all the other
work was just preparation
the time
for which all
the past is just citation
in my blood
you whisper
a misplaced revelation
six months more
and I’ll grow
tired of negotiation
and you’ll know
where to find me
holding a blue pen
writing
and even then
I’ll be asking
can I hold your hand?
5
(and even the best of us get the words wrong)
6
until my liquids fill up
the tub we bathe in
until the lights are turned on
and I am able to keep a secret
until and after I find peace
in the evening
when I learn to become a hero
for my broken pieces
like yellow lego evenings
after the very end and before the very beginning
I promise,
,
like the fish loves the sea,
like it needs it to be able to breathe,
and despite the haunting temporality of everything,
